You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize