I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
