she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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