would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize