she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
