Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
