I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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