who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
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What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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