i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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