you would pick up someone in the library
operation harelip BJ is a go
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
