actually, I'm a sock model
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize