you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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