hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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