doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
