You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
