I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
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If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
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He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here