Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
