She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
