the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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