I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
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