I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
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