But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
