Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
