i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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