if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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