If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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