Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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