Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize