dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize