I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize