I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
