there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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