I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize