I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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