But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
