it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
