Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
