She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
