No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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