So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
