If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
