so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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