Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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