sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
