Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize