fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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