I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
50% drunk capacity currently
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
