Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
