kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize