the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize